How ADHD Makes Me a Better Rugby Coach (and When It Totally Doesn’t)

ADHD, or, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is a neurodivergent condition on a spectrum. The type of ADHD a person has and how the symptoms present and affect their life differs massively from person to person. For example, boys might typically be the more stereotypical rowdy untamed children idea of ADHD, while women and girls might typically internalise their hyperactivity in the form of racing thoughts, constant talking, fidgeting etc.

Some people don’t even have the hyperactive element much or at all, purely experiencing the lack of focus, organisation and concentration symptoms that come with the attention deficit type. Of course, I had to have a combination of both and be one of the few women that are outwardly hyper at times. Soz. 

But how does this positively affect my ability to coach? 

High energy = high impact. I’m often buzzing with energy and new ideas and that kinda energy can be infectious on other people. Players have called me the one woman hype crew before.

Fast thinking = fast reactions. Got a problem? My brain knows how to fix it even if it’s something we’ve never experienced before. Absolutely thriving under extreme problem solving pressure is a plus. 

Hyperfocus mode: activated. A hyperfocus is like an extreme and all consuming obsession with something. My lifelong hyperfocus has been on the titanic (see also autistic special interest) but I can hyperfocus to the extent of learning every thing about a subject very quickly. My brain can zoom in with laser precision and means I’m deeply invested. 

Creative problem solving. I’m not a fan of ‘how it’s always done’ (unless it’s a safety or bureaucratic thing cause your girl loves rules). Instead much preferring creative and out-there ways to solve the problem in front of me. This makes for some super interesting skill zones that 99% of the time work all the time, hehe. 

Humour. Not totally sure if this is an ADHD thing or just my personality but my sense of humour is top drawer. Neurodivergent people are really good at masking too meaning that I can adapt to others personalities if need be, so your sense of humour becomes my sense of humour and I’m guaranteed to make you laugh. 

Big vision = big passion. I dream big, I love big, I want the best for everyone, and with all the above I’ll achieve it. 

So that all sounds ace, I hear you cry, so what are the downsides? ADHD is actually a disability in many senses of the word and not something you can get better from (though medication can help some symptoms) and there are many negatives- it’s not a condition I’d wish on my worst enemy. 

When is my brain my arch-nemesis?

Forgetful. That’s it. No amount of life hack or tip will stop me from forgetting my whistle, forgetting the balls, forgetting to text back. My brain doesn’t have that capacity. We’re currently praying for the safe keeping of a new key I’ve just been given. 

Struggling with session planning. We’re not the most organised people- although I do get a bit giddy for a spreadsheet, and that means session planning can be a bit of a hassle and unfortunately never will I ever be one of them coaches that can turn up and just pull things out of their head because see point 1. 

Talking in riddles. Getting distracted mid sentence and not saying something how we wanted to say it, or the best way it could be said. Not helpful for the players when giving them instructions, not helpful for my own sanity. 

Being easily distracted. Please don’t do anything that will distract me or that’s it (for example please do not bring a pet to training). 

Overcommitting and burning out. This is a major issue and one I am super guilty of. But everything I agree to and commit to is out of the passion mentioned above and wanting to provide the best experience for the players. ADHD is all gas, no brakes. 

Inability to manage emotions- RSD! Rejection sensitivity dysphoria is the un proportional feeling or belief that you’re not good enough, or not doing things right, or you’re a fraud or that no one likes you. It’s overwhelming and exhausting and can’t be controlled. We feel our emotions strongly, we care about being good and doing good, and we look for validation that might not always be there. 

How do I counter-act some of these issues?

Sometimes I just don’t- to be honest. Trying to be ‘someone you’re not’ and masking your adhd symptoms leads to burnout and poor mental health so it’s not a long term solution. 

Other times I’ll use lists, organisation techniques, delegation, honesty, and constant self development and learning. Having people who understand or at least try to around you is a massive help too. I introduced myself to my players at our first session by saying ‘hi I’m Hayley and I have ADHD so if I forget something or lose my focus that’s why.’ It was well received and people appreciate the honesty. 

The downsides was a pretty bleak list but all is not lost- there is a positive spin! All of these things, both good and bad make me me. And who I am is a successful, well respected Rugby Coach who sometimes just needs to remind herself. A person who cares deeply, is passionate, can hyperfocus on the important stuff, and keeps it fun, and to be honest, isn’t that exactly what you want from a sports coach?